Rare, never before seen: Wife Crime!

Location: Outside where the sun can happen

Act: Neglected to point out that the summer is hot

Description: Wife knew it was hot out but did not advise Husband of same. Husband wore jeans and was thus hot. In the summer.

Kudo: None received. Was made to listen to Husband complain of her negligent weather forecasting.

Expanding Barbaric Husband's Cultural Horizons

Location: Wife Justice Stronghold (the couch)

Act: Kindly asked Husband to join her for So You Think You Can Dance

Description: Thoughtfully exposed Husband to culture by viewing SYTYCD in his presence, thus allowing him to enjoy Bollywood and breakers. Lovingly fastforwarded through the judging panel and thus all of the screaming except for when Neil Patrick Harris was guesting.

Kudo: None given! Remains unthanked by philistine Husband who continues to refer to show as "your stupid dance show" with his dumb buttface.

Royal Proclamation

Location: Wife's Golden Esophagus

Act: Thunderous Belch

Description: Amused and entertained Husband (despite claims to the contrary). Amusement and entertainment confirmed by proclamation of "that was fucking impressive".

Kudo: More cream soda with which to further expound upon the discourse.

Wow!

Location: Orzammar

Act: Spin chopped that genlock's head off!

Description: DID YOU SEE THAT??

Kudo: None. Husband was playing Zombie Cafe. Husband charged with Husband Crime.

House Cleaning

Location: Within the aura of Wife's Awesome

Act: Picked up a sock

Description: Even though Alistair was waiting to make a declaration of love to Wife's Dalish Elf, she graciously picked up a sock (likely Husband's!) and deposited it bravely in the hamper.

Kudo: Wife was rewarded four more hours of Dragon Age without any further house work burdens.